You Know You're a Woodturner if...

[Russell Neyman]

I started a tongue-in-cheek discussion on another woodturning board that kinda took off and a ton of people enjoyed. So, I thought I'd share it with the AAW group in hopes that a few of you will chime in with your own contributions.

https://turnabouts.wordpress.com/2015/04/26/with-apologies-to-jeff-foxworthy/

 

[john lucas]

Very funny. I went looking for a new sport coat for my upcoming wedding. All I could think about when I saw the prices was how many thompson gouges I could by for that kind of money.

 

[John Torchick]

Truer words were never spoken! Love it!

 

[hockenbery]

A good laugh
Thanks

 

[Odie]

I laughed more than once reading that list!

You know you're a woodturner if you have wood shavings on your pillow!

ko

 

[Gretch Flo]

Very funny. I went looking for a new sport coat for my upcoming wedding. All I could think about when I saw the prices was how many thompson gouges I could by for that kind of money.

Now John, sometimes we have to sacrifice for the good of the family-altho I will emphasize sometimes!!!!!Hope you found a compatible coat!!!!-and not one that just sheds shavings!!!, Gretch

 

[john lucas]

Gretch I hadn't thought of a new turning smock. I nice tan one without logos would look nice with my dark brown pants I'm going wear. Unzip it part way so the tie shows you have it. I'll run that buy Lucy in the morning and see what she thinks. I did find out there's a gun show in town on the day of my wedding. I joking told here I could be back go and be back by noon. the wedding is 2. Just kidding of course because we are having it at our house and there will be lots of preparation to do with family and guests arriving and staying. Hey my DAd and son are into guns also maybe, Naw better not even suggest that.

 

[hockenbery]

Gretch I hadn't thought of a new turning smock. I nice tan one without logos would look nice with my dark brown pants I'm going wear. Unzip it part way so the tie shows you have it. I'll run that buy Lucy in the morning and see what she thinks. I did find out there's a gun show in town on the day of my wedding. I joking told here I could be back go and be back by noon. the wedding is 2. Just kidding of course because we are having it at our house and there will be lots of preparation to do with family and guests arriving and staying. Hey my DAd and son are into guns also maybe, Naw better not even suggest that.

John what about the wood shavings coat you posted a picture of a while back.
That one will never be out of style
Just don't back into a burning candle.

Al

 

[DUANE POLING]

I must admit I had let my beard growth get a bit long and noticed that I was pulling my razor in a skewed angle to get a cleaner shave. it runs deep!

 

[Hu Lowery]

got married at my house

Gretch I hadn't thought of a new turning smock. I nice tan one without logos would look nice with my dark brown pants I'm going wear. Unzip it part way so the tie shows you have it. I'll run that buy Lucy in the morning and see what she thinks. I did find out there's a gun show in town on the day of my wedding. I joking told here I could be back go and be back by noon. the wedding is 2. Just kidding of course because we are having it at our house and there will be lots of preparation to do with family and guests arriving and staying. Hey my DAd and son are into guns also maybe, Naw better not even suggest that.

John,

I got married at my house. My bride wanted a gown, she got a gown. I went out and bought a new black t-shirt and blue jeans, made sure my boots were presentable! I did offer to try to find one of the tux printed t-shirts but I didn't really want one. I can count how many times I have worn a suit in my life on one hand with plenty of fingers left over.

Not sure when you are doing this deal so congratulations, best wishes, and all of that stuff!

Hu

 

[john lucas]

Hu We are getting married at our new house which is on a small lake that used to be a camp back in the 20's. We will be right next to the dock. My fiance is wearing a 20's style dress so I thought I would look online. Found one of those 20's style striped bathing suits that goes from head to toe. Soooo tempted but she would probably shoot me.

 

[John Torchick]

John, you could go back farther back than the 20's. I suggest a loincloth, worn Tarzan-style, or a fig leaf. Fig leaves only come in one size.
Anyway, best wishes and best of luck to both of you.

 

[Hu Lowery]

if you wanna surprise her . . .

Hu We are getting married at our new house which is on a small lake that used to be a camp back in the 20's. We will be right next to the dock. My fiance is wearing a 20's style dress so I thought I would look online. Found one of those 20's style striped bathing suits that goes from head to toe. Soooo tempted but she would probably shoot me.

John,

If you want to surprise her I think this is the ticket. A decade or two later than her outfit but I think it would work!

Hu

http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=zoot+suit&qpvt=zoot+suit&qpvt=zoot+suit&FORM=IGRE

 

[Gretch Flo]

My son and future daughter-in-law are getting "married" (think the legal one in Kansas before) in Jamaica, oceanside wedding with a "cheap" wedding dress (think she says $600-to me that ain't cheap)- and she plans to go into the ocean with it!!!. Says guests shouldn't wear shoes-that I really like.
I got married in a red /white and blues dress-outdoor service at a church) , and the wedding store woman said "you can't get married in that". I said "I am buying this dress!!!!!" (cocktail dress-it could be worn to some other formal activites-but never did).
John-when is the date??? Gretch _

 

[john lucas]

Lucy bought her dress online for $220 (which I though was high but then my idea of dress up is a sport shirt with my Levi's and some shoes other than my Tennies) When we stopped in various bridal shops in Knoxville and she explained what she wanted they all looked shocked. Probably mumbled something about hillbilly's when we left.

 

[Hu Lowery]

if the solution to most problems involves a wood lathe

Back to the original subject: Was working on the exhaust of my truck today, the outer tubing had been crushed inward with a clamp. No problem, a quick end turned wooden swedge and I used the short heavy mallet I turned out of oak a year or two ago to whack it. A few days ago I was fighting a badly corroded aluminum spindle housing, the other end was round for a couple inches. Into the lathe it went for cleanup. My brother was fixing to buy sixteen u-bolts to attach PVC tubing to 2x4's. No problem, I'll make the last six inches of the 2 by's round. While I have my share of turned gee-gaws around the place I also have a lot of turned working tools too.

When all you have is a hammer, most problems look like a nail. When you have a wood lathe . . .

Hu

 

[john lucas]

I had to put in a new inside door one time. I didn't have much money and went to the surplus store to buy a door. The only one they there had the door knob hole in the wrong spot. Well I'm a turner. I turned a plug to fit exactly and filled the edges with wood putty. You couldn't tell I had done it after a good paint job. Day saved by a wood lathe.

 

[David Hill]

What I "see"

On those occasions that I get to road travel, I just can't help looking at passing trees and wondering--"what the grain looks like in a section of the tree?", and "how many blanks I could cut from the trunk?"
Sometimes I even slow down just to see a tree----tell me I'm not the only one.

 

[Bill Boehme]

----tell me I'm not the only one.

I'm afraid that you're the only one, Dave.

 

[John Torchick]

Dave, have you thought about getting some help for this serious problem you are having?

 

[john lucas]

I think you have to go to AAW meetings for that problem.

 

[Mike Peace]

You know you are a woodturner when you eat your breakfast cereal from a wooden bowl.